Who needs the Muses for inspiration when you have a beta reader to tell you what to do?
Dear Dante (do you mind if I call you Dan?),
First of all, I don't want you to be crushed by what I write below. I think you have a really good fic here, with lots of interesting characters and fantastic action. With a little work, I think you can make it good enough to post at historic_slash.
(By the way, I don't want to receive any more "I am a published author" letters from you. Stuff you can get away with in pro fic, you'll get slaughtered for in fandom. I'm trying to save you from flames – remember that.)
Let me start by giving you the bad news: Your story has some major problems.
¶ Available as online fiction: If Dante Had a Beta Reader.